paddled from changi to pasir ris then to pulau ubin yesterday.
i'm so disappointed with myself.
i have my highs and lows, just like everybody else.
yesterday was just bad.
i nearly cried while paddling.
i feel that i'm so weak, so lousy and all.
i was one of the last few at the back.
coach had to make it worse by scolding me non stop from pasir ris all the way to pulau ubin.
19km of paddling under the sultry heat really pushed me to my limits.
i felt so bloody tired, my thigh muscle, back and arm hurts.
and yes, i'm still aching everywhere.
i just wished i was stronger, more determined.
goodness, why am i such a loser.
rawr.
i want to get better at canoeing.
i want to paddle faster and so, i must go for every training from now on.

i can't wait for tomorrow.
training and dinner.
neither can i wait for next monday.
SHOPPING.CLOTHES SHOES BAGS.OMG.
i.am.such.a.bimbo.sometimes.haha.
i'm getting my pay this weekend too (:

i like surprise phonecalls. it seemed almost too coincidental, like a right timing sort of thing.
so i said, "let me tell you a secret" and in return, some words got back to me.
kind ones. the reassuring kind.
one sentence that made some things feel much better.
i think im just grateful to know that im never alone.
that some, the unexpected ones, actually do care.thankful enough.

i think i prefer honey stars to koko krunch.